In simplest terms, the Bungie Community is a gathering of gamers who appreciate the games we make and the people who play them. When we imagine Bungie.net as a real place, we see a thundering mob of anonymous faces that outnumber us by a factor of hundreds of thousands to one. Without forms of control in place, they would trample us under their charging feet.
Our saving grace is an elite order of forum moderators. These volunteer crime fighters protect the innocent from trolls and ne’er-do-wells. With a swing of their might banhammer, they keep the peace and defend us from the chaos that threatens the very fabric of our community. From their secure compound under the mysterious “HFCS” banner, these protectors of harmony preside over the boards that host our discussions and mete out justice wherever it is needed. This week, we thought it appropriate to dedicate our mail room to only collecting letter addressed to these unsung heroes. They have assembled to answer those questions that don’t compromise their cloak of stealth.
Meet your friendly neighborhood Forum Ninjas (at least, those that were available for comment).
just another fan
bobcast
BobBQ
Duardo
evilcam
borrowedchief
El Roboto
Recon Number 54
odmichael
Yoozel
Dr Weird
x Foman 123 x
Gods Prophet
Butane 123
x Lord Revan x
Old Papa Rich
Qbix89
Ninjas! Materialize from within a sudden cloud of smoke. Let’s open the Sack.
ALI217 Which ninja is the most respected amongst you?
x Foman 123 x Personally, I respect Recon Number 54 the most. This message paid for by Recon Number 54.
evilcam Respect and fear are pretty much the same thing.
bobcast I've always had a crush on Yoozel.
odmichael I respect what every single one of these guys does.
Duardo I'd say anyone who spends time in the report queue definitely earns my respect, 'cept Butane.
El Roboto I respect all of them, more as one would respect friends and family than as colleagues.
x Lord Revan x We're all well respected, except Underdog. He has a love affair with baked beans.
just another fan In truth, they are a fine bunch of individuals whom I all respect. Yes, even Qbix. I'm proud to be part of the team. But seriously, I'm the most respected.
borrowedchief Not Qbix.
Qbix89 Judging by the other replies, it's definitely not me.
arch4ng13 What is the actual purpose for the "Welcoming Committee" group compared to HFCS?
We have no idea what you are talking about – and neither do you. What you are asking about does not exist, and you cannot prove otherwise. Move along… Move along…
Adamcunn Do you get a sick thrill from banning members? (Be honest).
just another fan A certain amount of thrill can be quite healthy, thank you!
BobBQ No, only chest pains and a facial tic.
Duardo Do I enjoy banning spammers and trolls? YOU BET! Do I enjoy banning those that made an honest mistake or those who come here regularly to have some fun? No.
evilcam I rarely ever even ban users.
Borrowedchief Honestly, if it's a spam attack, well known spammer, or just a silly alt, yes. The sickest of sick. If it's just a user that just doesn't seem to get the rules, then I feel sad panda-ish.
El Roboto No, but sometimes I do fell the creeping urge for a bottle of rum.
odmichael I banned Soulja Boy once. That was pretty entertaining.
x Foman 123 x It can get frustrating when members choose to learn the rules by trial-and-error rather than taking 5 minutes to read the rules. On the other hand, the sound of the banhammer whistling down onto a really bad user is so sweet.
Gods Prophet Of course not! I mean, I do laugh hysterically every time I ban someone but I'm pretty sure that's unrelated.
Butane 123 My actual hobbies would make any sick thrill I'd get from [banning someone] seem as tame as the merry-go-round in an amusement park full of roller coasters.
Old Papa Rich Without hesitation, yes. I even laugh maniacally.
The Yeti If you could permaban any Bungie employee without them figuring it out, who'd you ban?
We would figure it out. We can smell the ozone that accompanies the appearance of a Ninja from a mile away. Bungie employees are above the law on Bungie.net, and immune to a strike from the Ninja’s hammer. Nevertheless, your question is intriguing, so we will let it stand.
bobcast I'd make it a rotating ban. They'd never know when it would come or how long it would last.
BobBQ Stosh. It will be vengeance six years in the making.
Duardo Achronos without question. Well...him or Halcylon. I'm not sure who the bigger jerk is...probably Hal.
T1B3R7uMB0YXVI Can I take you guys out for a steak dinner on the day before PAX?
That sounds dangerously like a bribe, Sir. You aren’t attempting to manipulate a law enforcement official are you? In the real world, that is highly illegal, you know. Fortunately, as we are fond of reminding people, Bungie.net is safely isolated from the real world. Just know this: It takes more than a slab of meat to make our Ninjas soft on crime. Let’s see who wants to take your bait.
Duardo You could take me out for a steak dinner every night (if you're paying).
evilcam Are you coming on to me? Oh, I answered your question with another question. Sorry about that. Answer: absolutely.
borrowedchief Steak is always welcome.
Dr Weird Steak is good and all, but I would rather have cake of some sort.
x Lord Revan x Whoa now, you aren't Luke Smith!
Qbix89 Medium done. (that means yes)
Can I come, too?
defnop552 What's the worst thing about moderating the forums?
bobcast Sometimes I see a thread I'd really like to post in. Upon entering it, I find spam and nonsense. By the time I finish cleaning it up, I don't feel like posting.
Duardo Sometimes I can't truly engage in a conversation due to my position. People either fear I will ban them for having a different opinion, or they just quote me and take the discussion off-topic. Also, seeing Halcylon around and not being able to do anything about it.
borrowedchief Nothing really. Sometimes you have to catch your tongue. Other than that, we are normal. We are ninjanonymous.
Dr Weird I don't like to ban people unless they really have it coming. Most of the bans I give out could have easily been avoided if people had read the rules.
just another fan Answering the mail sack.
evilcam When DeeJ tells us to keep it light.
So sorry to cramp your style. I though this question was a little heavy, so I made a simple little suggestion. Forgive me for trying to put a happy face on things! I should have just led with this next question…
Xd00999 Favorite part of being a Ninja?
Dr Weird Salmon text.
bobcast All the hate mail. It really shows how creative the community is. Also, it turns out my mother really gets around.
BobBQ Feeling the Schadenfreude.
odmichael Helping the my favorite video game company in the whole wide world of course!
Duardo Definitely the chicks, or having a brotherhood of sorts. I'm not sure which one is better.
evilcam There's a huge pic thread in HFCS. Some pics are tasteful, some are downright nasty. All are virtual treasures.
borrowedchief WIELDING UNLIMITED POWER!
x Foman 123 x No-pants days. The best part is that every day is no-pants day
x Lord Revan x The sheer sense of community and the general feel-goodness of being able to help out.
Qbix89 My favorite part has to do with stuff that I'm not really allowed to talk to you guys about, which makes it even more awesome. (Typical ninja answer right here).
coolmike699 What's the best PM you've gotten?
bobcast I'm a "racist turtle snowman."
BobBQ Collectively, the death threats.
Duardo I got a PM back in 2008 from The Superintendent. His wise words of wisdom? "IN CASE OF FIRE, USE STAIRS."
Dr Weird Someone asked to be banned because they thought they spent too much time on Bungie.net.
x Lord Revan x Well, let’s just say the individual thought that I was in love with a pink bunny costume and that I belonged in an insane asylum. I think he was thinking of Slayer.
Kr1egerdude How well do you know each other in real life?
bobcast I've hung out with Foman once. I play on live with several others often. I've drunk dialed/text a few, too.
Duardo About as well as a mother hen knows her chicks.
El Roboto We have had meet ups at PAX almost annually now. Most often, it’s just casual online interactions.
x Foman 123 x I talk to a lot of my fellow Ninjas away from Bungie.net pretty frequently. I've met most of them at PAX and LAN parties, and I'd consider them to be real friends.
Qbix89 I'm proud to say that quite a few of the members of HFCS are my real life friends, just as I am equally proud that I have never met evilcam.
MsCadetUNIVERSE May I ask if any of you lovely gentlemen are single?
Oooooh... I really don’t recommend dating a Ninja. Their hours are long, and you spend a lot of lonely nights wondering if they will come home after their shift. It’s totally your call, but I think a nice girl like you might be a lot happier with a graphic designer or someone a little more harmless. At the same time, the heart wants what the heart wants, so let’s meet our eligible bachelors from the bunch. Prepare to put your best foot forward, gentlemen.
evilcam Yes, you may ask.
just another fan SMM L4 STR
bobcast Single Forum Ninja. Owns own home, has a good job, has own car. Wants kids, looking for long term relationship. Hobbies include swinging banhammer, locking spam threads, making trolls cry, and making vague sarcastic post.
Duardo Single guy living in his parents basement looking for someone to cut these chains off the desk so I can get out of here (For the love of God, help me!). Foman's Mom helps out some, but she's always leaving for other appointments.
Gods Prophet Sensitive and caring ninja (classified) years old with seeks female community companion, nonsmoker, for being stealthy.
Qbix89 Single Norwegian Master Moderator seeks lifelong companion. Do you have what it takes to melt my cold, Viking heart? Hobbies: Biking in the rain, pillaging friendly villages, wearing tights and petting cats.
BobBQ I'm single. I'm also completely uninterested.
antony X1000 What is the funniest ban appeal you have received?
just another fan Your older/younger brother is a terrible person. Whenever you visit the bathroom, he controls your account and spams these forums. Of course you, dear reader, are innocent!
BobBQ I've never actually received a funny ban appeal, only deluded, narcissistic and occasionally violent ones.
Duardo Someone once told me to use proper inglish, and then called me stoopid.
evilcam A bunch of people appealing to me because Foman apparently won't reply to them anymore. What's entertaining about it is I ALWAYS agree with the unpleasant things they have to say about Foamy. I've made tons of lifelong friends, based solely on the unifying hatred that Foamy spreads.
borrowedchief I remember a user saying he was going to eat my liver.
DE4THINC4RN4TE Do you get special access to BUNGIE info because you are a ninja?
BobBQ I got into the Pimps at Sea closed beta.
Duardo Getting to meet the crew at PAX 2010 in their new place was especially nice.
evilcam Bungie once told me that I'm a terrible ninja and that they all collectively hoped I die alone. That counts as special access to insider info right? I think it does.
Yoozel You mean besides the company car, weekly meetings on the rock wall at the studio, first class trips during PAX, sweet t-shirts, the occasional stolen item off of Marty's desk and monthly shipments of Pacific King Salmon delivered to our doors? There's also the occasional beta invite and occasional late night rendezvous to play games before their release and chow down on pizza.
Gods Prophet Officially, no. Just between you and me, we are made privy to certain information regarding certain Bungie black projects and what a certain gorilla-suited man ape has actually been doing all these years and why he can't answer the phone right now.
Butane 123 I always liked getting into the Halo betas super early. In the Halo: Reach beta, me and Qbix were searching for matches with the population counter reading only 40. We were running into pretty well known gamers and people in the industry every game.
x Lord Revan x They give us hugs and plenty of love.
Bobcast We have possibly the rarest Bungie t-shirt ever made, we get Christmas cards, and Brandi sends us emails.
When the time comes for you to be drafted into the service of the Bungie Beta, it will be Brandi that issues your orders. We use our Ninjas as test pilots for each experiment. Not only do we value their opinions, but we like to put them on alert in the event that another test subject starts violating their sworn oath once they leave the lab. Oh, and Bobcast suffers from delusions that Brandi likes him the best. He thinks that he is the only one receiving her messages. You know, like those crazy people who think the news anchor is speaking only to them? The guy is totally nuts, but in a way that we can use.
Khirna How hard is it to maintain moderation balance among all of the ninjas? Each person has a different interpretation of the rules, and I'm assuming that the ninjas are no exception. Is that something you guys decide in HFCS, or are you trusted enough to make a well-informed decision?
borrowedchief Not at all. I think we all have a central understanding of the rules. Believe it or not, there is not much disagreement. And if there ever is, we are always able to hash it out.
just another fan We are free to act as we see fit. I don't think there is whole lot of difference in interpretation, but more in how to handle a situation.
bobcast We often communicate with each other. We are connected by MSN, phone, PM, and in HFCS. When we see something we're not sure how to handle, we often will shoot a message to someone to get a second opinion.
BobBQ I'm unable to confirm or deny your assumption, but the pig is very happy and what's the harm in a sauna bath anyway?
Duardo While we may slightly differ in styles, the rules are still the same. We trust each other enough that we don't have to worry about what someone else may do. We are a team, and if we do have a problem, we discuss it as a team and then make a decision.
Evilcam They all know to stay out of my way. They all know it’s best to never question my judgment. They all know that I'm always right.
El Roboto Cohesion among us is pretty consistent, but we are human after all (at least most of us are).
odmichael We follow the code of conduct. Sometimes that may mean using our own judgment. Overall, we are a team. If there is a question, someone else will be able to address it.
Yoozel Besides getting face-slammed by Achronos and DeeJ, we take a very committee approach to issues that arise. We pull out of the Wheel-o-Phun and gather the brethren for top shelf liquor to see which dauntingly comical retort we can mask our true motives under.
Dr Weird We converse a lot more than people think so it really isn't a problem.
x Foman 123 x We generally trust each other to exercise good judgment. There is some difference in how some "gray area" posts are dealt with, but we really spend a lot more time and effort than some people realize trying to be consistent in rules enforcement.
Butane 123 It’s always been the idea that we are independent enough so that we don't have to be watched over by the powers that be. We trust each other to make good decisions and know that we can always ask for advice.
x Lord Revan x We are driven by the same code of conduct, and we're expected to maintain consistency between ourselves. When we're confused and lost out there, we support one another. We're a fraternity of sorts.
Old Papa Rich We don't try to be perfect. It isn't possible. Decisions are mostly the individual judgment you mentioned, but there is a fair amount of advice sought and given.
Qbix89 Being consistent with your own actions is one thing. To have a consistency between the different members of the group is another. We have a basic set of rules and guidelines that we follow. In the end, we usually have to trust our own instincts and our own judgment. I think we do a pretty good job at it, but we make mistakes.
T1B3R7uMB0YXVI In before DeeJ locks this!
Are you still here? I figured you would be working a second job so that you would be able to afford all that steak you promised to buy. Save your pennies, because the Ninjas are sharpening their knives.
Recon Number 54 I offer the following reply to any and all of the listed questions:
"I kind of like the swelling, but the itching is driving me insane!"
Thanks. That’s just super. Everyone is thrilled that you shared that, its amazing that your one and only comment got past the censors. I will make a mental note to evaluate our Ninja roster with urk. Unless anyone else has an outburst like that planned, it is time to bring this session of sharing to an end.
Bungie Community, please join me in thanking our Ninjas for the watch they keep over our happy home. While those of you who have fallen under the strike of their hammer may see them as villains, we see them as the heroes of our community. We hope that most of you agree.